FIRST TIME LAST TIME

FIRST TIME LAST TIME

When was the last time you did something for the first time? This is not your first time reading this question in this space. Since I last asked it, I have become MORE cognizant of first-time things. My awareness is heightened personally but I find myself noticing first-time occurrences in other people’s lives too. My observation from both vantage points has prompted me to ponder this question, “When was the last time I did something for the last time?” with the awareness that it can the first time and last time simultaneously and that I may not recognize either in the moment. With their permission I reference two events in the lives of loved ones.

The two, first time and last time, collided when the mother of a good friend and the mother of a favorite grandnephew (son of my niece) died within days of each other. Both, for the first time, watched and waited for their mother’s final breath while wondering if each day would be the last time to have that experience.

My friend spoke in the weeks before her mother’s soul left her body of making the moments with her matter…of creating memories. She, her immediate family, and friends surrounded wife, mother, grandmother, sister, and friend, aware that this was the first time and most likely the last time occurring simultaneously without knowing when. When death happened, my friend was at her mother’s side – another first time and last time. If you were to ask my friend, “When was the last time you did something for the first time?” she would probably have more examples than you have time to read.

On the other hand, my great nephew visited his mom early in the summer. He came back to us filled with the expectation that if she could jump some hurdles, recovery was possible and probable. After all, less than a year ago, he and his siblings celebrated her birthday around the same time. Had I posed either question – first-time or last time, his mother’s death would not have been on his radar. He didn’t know the birthday celebration would be the last birthday celebration. His visit in June was the first time that he had seen his mother ill. And although filled with hope of recovery, I wonder if he wondered if this were the last time he would see her alive. I doubt it.

Death, which is inevitable, is a great teacher. Acceptance of death is vital to living a well-balanced life. Humans are slow learners. I know because I am human. So, death keeps repeating its lesson. None of us knows if or when a first-time thing will be a last-time thing - a great reason to savor the moment. Look for opportunities to do first-time things with an urgency that this may be the last opportunity to do anything for the first- or last-time.

Thank you, friend, and grandnephew, for allowing me the opportunity of sharing this for the first time with you.

The morning that I penned these lines; I read the words that I invite you to ponder.

“No matter where you are in life and what your state of mind may be, dare to fall in love and let yourself be loved. When love becomes your realm of being, you are as beloved in life as in death.” Rumi

BOTH MOTHERS DARED!

2 Timothy 1:7

FIRST TIME - LAST TIME