FENCES

FENCES

PRACTICE: Which of your emotions or thoughts are off limits to others?

Two of my favorite actors– Denzel and Viola play husband and wife in a movie, “Fences.” The movie is an excellent example of how cultural, economic, and self-erected internal fences limit someone and those who are close to them from experiencing the fullness of God-given, constitutional and cultural rights. J.R.R. Tolkien (Lord of the Rings author) said, “The wide world is all about you: you can fence yourself in, but you cannot forever fence it out.” As Denzel discovered, the fences he built to protect and preserve himself and his loved ones didn’t last forever – the world came crashing in.

Perhaps Shonda Rhimes (screenwriter and TV producer) expresses the thought best, “Boundaries don’t keep other people out, they fence you in.”

In my married adult life, I have lived in four different houses in four different cities. Three of those homes had an actual fence and the other a thick border of shrubs, all designed to keep others out, to provide protection and privacy… not a terrible thing. The fences protected my stuff and the people I love. While traveling in developing nations, fences around homes will often have chards of broken glass or barbed wire embedded in the top of them.

“We spend our life building higher fences and stronger locks, when the gravest dangers are already inside,” says author Richard Paul Evans. Boundaries and fences make it easier for one to conceal the internal grave dangers, the battles being fought and the accompanying anxiety. Others who may be fighting or have fought similar battles and could offer help, are kept on the other side of the fence. Fences of this type are usually built with bricks made of fear and cemented into place by the mortar of pride. Are these fences soothing and comfortable? Absolutely. However, it is a false sense of security. Fences built of fear and pride take an enormous amount of time and effort to maintain and eventually need repairing. Our friends and family get a glimpse into our inner battleground.

Some who struggle will dismantle the fence and opt for the help needed. They are tired of waging the war alone. Others will quickly repair the fence with denial (barbed wire and chards of glass) and continue to live the pain of inner warfare.

I believe the adage, “Fences make good neighbors.” That is my experience. However, I can also validate from personal experience, that fences built around my heart and life challenges have sometimes led to the erosion of my health and the deterioration of some relationships.

James 5:16

PONDER THIS THOUGHT--- Fences limit movement.